Thursday, August 25, 2005

Free Jazz...I think

Christ, I've got so much to do tonight. And yet here I am goofing around at the cafe. It's almost ten. How depressing. So I'm reading the Fermanta. It's an amazing book. I'm also reading this 911 time line book. Very freaky shit man. The govt had their grubby paws all over that. Bush you sorry bastard...you and your boys have got blood on your hands. Is ruling the world that cool? Sounds like a big ol' pain in the ass to me. En plus, I think it makes you kind of perverted. Pervert. You give perverts a bad name. Bush, you're like that yellow bastard in Sin City. Stinky and nasty.

I saw this beautiful piece of furniture up the road today. God, I was so tempted to buy that shit. Lovely. I'm such a stoner. How many times do you have to remind yourself...do not talk to people when you're high.

Two weeks all to myself...gonna be nice. Just don't blow your wad.

Older than Young

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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Puking Sucks...


So check it...the owner of the hitherto unnamed company is flying me out to a large west coast city this friday. I'm not sure if I'm caught up on rent. I feel like I am. I made a budget and everything. Fucking thieving ass children. They mentally fucked up my flow. Anyway, I'm excited I've never been to the west coast...This is me as a lady. I must say I look damn good. You know what though...I'm still single to mingle. I keep thinking to myself I need to work out...keep a consistent style...but all of that takes...gulp...work. And you know how I feel about that sort of thing.

Like I was looking at folks on the train...and the young people my age are so beautiful and stylish. I feel my competitive hackles rise then...poof...I'm thinking about something else...like how I got totally fucking drunk Sunday night and ended up riding the fucking Q train from one end to the other twice! En fucking plus, at one point I wake up from my totally obliterated stated to see some cocksucker with his head between my legs jerking off...I kid you not. I haven't decided if I should be traumatized yet. The shit is kind of funny. Kind of. Now I look at all the skeevy black dudes on the subway and am ready to mutilate and deform. Like had I been in a more sober state, it probably would not have happened....but still I would have been ready to put my foot in his sorry ass.

And the hangover...good christ...I'm still soar from puking. Of course I woke up uber late for work and completely worked over. I had to leave early. I spent all of monday night sleeping and puking up bile. I'm seriously considering early retirement from drinking. Or really...goddamn free drinks at Moe's on Sunday nights....and don't mix pot brownies with booze...rookie moves...man rookie moves.

God the affection of a baby animal can fix anything.

Chelsea is a lovely neighborhood. Sugar mama o sugar mama where art thou and shit?
I was over this afternoon after work checking out some homage to graffiti. Like they re-created old school subway cars and had folks go to town on them. Apparently Bloomberg try to stop it, but you can't keep the people down. You can only limit their activities between this street and that.

I can respect that version of hip hop. This new fangled shit can blow me.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Internet dating...

I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna try internet dating. Jesus talk about rock fucking bottom. Eh gads...I should go home and smoke some dope. But If I go home...I'm not going back out into the city....my friend Al who is moving back to MN called me to invite me out to Apt. my favorite fucking night club...and I'm sitting here wit my goddamn thumb up my ass...thinking to myself...oh well I have an 8:30 meeting tomorrow morning...goddamnit! I'm all gross from painting...and I think I started my period. Totally not in a going out mood...but Al's my boy.

Ok so I just cracked open another smirnoff ice. Carmen gets off work in an hour and a half...can you make it? I'm at Carmen's coz I'm baby sitting her kitten. I'm gonna have to buy Carmen smore Smirnoff Ices...she's actually got liquer proper at her crib...

So I've been thinking about cutting my dred locks off...I'm kind of over the look...I shaved off the sides, but still I'm ready to cut all of them off, but I've vowed to keep them until I was 30. It's a commitment thing.

SIgh...bored bored bored.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Damn the Man...

I'm frickin' starving. Where is my Mexican food. Looks like Shandar might still be in my sights...

So I'm surfing butchfemmeblahblah.com, and came across an ex-lover. I'm kind of chuckling, but I'm also like Christ on the cross...Hi Liz. Hair modeling sounds cool.

AAAArgh! There had better be a dimunitive little Mexican man coming to deliver my quesadillas al pastor or there is going to be hell to pay! The waitress was being a total cunt...I shoulda known.....wait...wait...ok. It's here. I take it all back. It's the blood sugar you know..

God...It's real local Mexican food...which is to say...my quesadilla came on fried corn. And now for the nachos...much better...

So my wallet got stolen, and then it was miraculously found....I say miraculous triflin' coz these little girls I work with are bad and obvious...

God what a draining day...I barely made it out to Vox Pop. I'm very pleased with the Nachos...anyway....bad ass kids...but I'll be back tomorrow. Happily.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Low Light Nights

I don't know if I'm hungry or not. That insufferable old Haitian is loitering about outside the cafe again. This time he's brought a friend. You cocksuckers can rot. I'm not in the mood. You guys...I think I'm getting over NYC. I can feel that knawing feeling I had back in Austin rearing it's head again. I gotta keep movin'. This time though I'm puttin' together a plan. I'm saving money.

I've been hangin' out Brazilian stylee...I went to a show. I had some delicious Brazilian food. Got advice about travel to Brazil from a nice family. The dad was kind of hot. Yes, I'm still a known homosexual. I just like lookin' at men.

I got some nice eye contact at PS1. Turns out she was too short for my liking, but the eye stuff was nice none the less.

I also found out a friend of mine is hookin'. It's best not to care, and just love the girl and the trip she's on. But I've secretly vowed to read her the riot act if shit gets out of control. I worry.

The cafe is about to close. I should rap this up. Still no word on the gay tv show. Considering how diar my sex life is...I totally need to get on that show.

Jen Kern. Grrr...you still make me crazy.


I need to get crackin' on the love letter thing. I gotta get a p.o. box. I think motherfuckers are stealing shit out of my mailbox.

Damn I can't shake this lonely sinking feeling. Last night on the way home I was in such a rage. I just kept flinging things out of my bag, disgusted with everything. Saturday nights man...they kind of fucking suck. Well really it was that damn Hungarian, Gugi...or some shit. What a demanding little piglet she was being. I think she's envious of Adriana. It seems like Gugi's got the pedigree, but Adriana got the class and noble blood. She's delicious. Gugi, ain't.

Brooke Shields is still beautiful fuck all the haters!

Friday, August 12, 2005

Pauvre Lola

I found a week old kitten in the south bronx. My friend Carmen adopted the little lady. Right now I just put her inside my shirt. I figure it made her feel like she was back with her mama. God, that's the part that bums me out about kittens. She's like forever alone in the world now. She's asleep inside my shirt. She is so fucking cute. I like playing the moma. I think it suits me. So I saw this hottie in Soho this afternoon that I saw at my birthday party the other night. God is she lovely. She's a brunette version of Diana, and WAY WAY cooler. Me and god had a little chat on the subway this after noon about hooking me up with a hottie like her provided she's a known homosexual and likes her ladies butch of center and chub of center.It could happen. This week has been pretty cool at the gig. I've been doing alot of driving.

So I recently had a birthday. I called in a blog rolling my face off. I've decided that I'll be in nyc for another 2 -5 years, but then after that...I'm bouncing to another country.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Friday, August 05, 2005

Vox

Those Iowa boys are wild. This band I'm kind of suffering through is from Iowa. I think they circle jerk with each other. They seem like the type. I mean that in the nicest possible way. So I had a seven hour nap today. I feel good. Tomorrow is my birthday. I'll be 27...that much closer to 30. That much closer to happy. Yep. I'm still happy. These goddamn pop up are gonna be the death of me. I think I'm going to ask my step mom to buy me the Cowon iAudio X5L. It looks cool as fuck, and if you're gonna buy an MP3 Player, better get it with bad ass features. I don't mind the band so much now. I like indy pop. Call me old fashioned. So back to turnin' 27. I suppose really like every birthday with the exception of the ones from my childhood, I'm just shocked. Like Jesus this aging thing really does happen.. Nice I can recover posts if I do something stupid. For a second there I thought I had lost this post.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Monday, August 01, 2005

Illy

So a shit ton of people hit up my site today. Nice. None of them stayed for long, thta's cool. There's nothing much here. Just my life, and who gives a hooey about that. I fuckin' jammed my finger trying to relive the old days on the concrete courts of nyc. I must say though, getting thrashed about playing with the boys is still damn good fun. I would just like to point out that you'll be 27 here in a week and that kind of behaviour...well...let's just say that the sun has set on this gut.

So I'm at the local coffee shop and some dude is listening to a haitian radio station and generally freaking out on the phone. It's nice. I'm just grateful he didn't try to chat me up. My neighborhood is the bomb. I won't be going anywhere anytime soon. I'm gonna renew my lease. Let's just hope I can stay gainfully employed. Christ these women at the gig are raking me over the goddamn coals! I haven't even been in my new position a month and they are already hassling me about my numbers...and yet I"m not in a sales position. Fuck them...like I've been saying for the last week...I play better when I'm pissed. I refuse to get bummed about this job. FUCK THEM! Those kids make me happy.

I talked to my old friend Ryan back home. God, that was good. It's nice to have people in your life where the arduous process of getting to know someone is already done and over with, but what's more those particular processes were awesome anyhow.

Up here....I'm still leary. I'm feeling less and less surrounding the summer of 2001. I'm getting there. Where's my Dorothy Parker waitress working the night shift? Dishwater blonde. Tall and fine. She got a lot of tips. Well I think I've met her but she's outta my league. I'm still coming to terms with my mediocrity. I'm not trying to be self depreciating, it's just true. I'm so normal it's not even funny. Have you ever read the Magus? So true man....so true.

Damn...dude with the radio is seriously trying to make up lost ground with his lady. She sounds pissed...he's all hemmin' and hawin'....immigrant love.

I should go for a walk in my neighborhood more often. It helped.
this is an audio post - click to play